Mysterious Islamic Tribe Where Women Have Sex With Different Men, Don’t Wear A Veil And Own Property
Behind the ancient
way of life for the Tuareg tribe of the Sahara is a culture so progressive it
would even make some in liberal western cultures blush.
Women are allowed to
have multiple sexual partners outside of marriage, keep all their property on
divorce and are so revered by their sons-in-law that the young men wouldn't
dare eat in the same room.
What is even more
surprising is that even though the tribe has embraced Islam they have firmly
held onto some of the customs that would not be acceptable to the wider Muslim
world.
It is the men, and
not the women, who cover their faces, for example.
Photographer Henrietta Butler, who has been fascinated by
the Tuareg since she first followed them through the desert in 2001, once asked
why this was. The explanation was simple.
‘The
women are beautiful. We would like to see their faces.’
But this is
certainly not the only place the Tuareg, related to the Berbers of North
Africa, differ from the Muslim world of the Middle East, and even other parts
of their own continent.
Before a woman
marries, she is free to take as many lovers as she wants.
These
two children were pictured in December 1967. Tuareg children traditionally stay
with their mothers after a divorce
‘They turn a blind
eye,’ explained Butler. ‘The young girls have the same great freedoms as the
boys.’
For years, the men
of the Tuareg have been able to ride to a young woman’s tent, and sneak into
the side entrance – while his well-trained camel stands quietly and waits.
There, they will
spend the night together – while the family, who all live in the tent, politely
pretend not to notice.
Should the woman
choose to welcome a different man into her tent the next day, so be it.
However, there is
also a code of practice which none would dare break. Privacy is all important
for this centuries old tribe of nomads, who once crossed the desert bringing
dates, salt and saffron south, and slaves and gold north.
The idea of
breaking the rules of courtship would be mortifying; as a result, the man is
always gone before sunrise.
‘The Tuareg are
utterly discreet. Everything is done with utmost discretion and respect,’ said
Butler.
The relaxed customs
around sexual partners has resulted in the girls getting married later than
they may otherwise do, with the age of 20 not being uncommon.
Although, before
then, they will have been wooed with poetry written by the men, who spend hours
carefully crafting the words which they hope will win their beloved over.
But it is not a
one-way street: the women are just as capable of putting pen to paper, using
their own alphabet, taught to them by their mothers.
‘The women also make
poetry eulogizing the men,’ says Butler. ‘There is high romance and idolatry.’
Unlike
in so many other cultures, women lose none of their power once they marry
either. Many marriages end
in divorce among the Tuareg. And when it happens, it is the wife who keeps both
the animals and the tent. And it is she who normally decides that she’s had
enough.
His wife, meanwhile,
will keep possession of everything she brought to the marriage and that
includes the children.
The mother’s camp,
Butler explains, is the root of the community, the home everyone returns to –
and this arrangement ensures it stays that way.
And there is no
shame in divorce. Families will often throw their daughters a divorce party, to
let other men know they are available once more.
But this is not a
matriarchal society, where the women are in charge.
Butler
explains it is still the men ‘who sit and talk politics’. But even here, the
women can be deferred to. They are often consulted for their views by their
sons or husbands, and are quietly pulling the strings behind the
scenes.
However, Tuareg
society is matri-lineal, which means the families trace their lines through the
women, rather than the men, right the way back to their first queen.
So, Butler
explained: ‘Traditionally, the man would belong to the woman’s group, rather
than the other way around.’
The preference for
the women’s line goes as far as man leaving his possessions to his sister’s son
as it ‘is considered a stronger link to your family than to your own son’.
In other words, it
can be guaranteed that your sister’s child belongs to your sister, rather than
a man’s son, who cannot be absolutely guaranteed to share his genes.
A
nomadic Tuareg woman in front of her tent, with younger children sit inside.
The mother’s tent is the heart of the family.
Before
young Tuareg women marry, they are allowed to take as many different lovers as
they want – as long as they abide by the strict rules of privacy which govern
their society.
This
means the man must only arrive at her tent after dark, and leave before
sunrise. Pictured: A Tuareg woman’s decorated hands.
But there is one
tradition which is certainly far more unusual: it is highly rude for a man to
eat in front of a woman who he cannot have sexual relations with, or any of his
elders.
In front of his
mother-in-law it is especially shameful.
‘I didn’t realise
this until the I was having dinner with a Tuareg woman, who had brought her
son-in-law as her travelling companion,’ Butler recalled.
‘We were all sitting
down to dinner, and the man has his back turned. She said the poor man was
completely horrified because he has to eat with his mother-in-law.’
But it is unlikely
he would have ever complained about it, or felt sorry from himself. The very
idea is horrendous to the Tuareg.
‘You would shame
yourself. The Tuareg will go to great lengths to maintain personal dignity.
They will suffer,’ said Butler.
‘If they are not
offered water, they won’t ask for it – even if they are thirsty.’
Perhaps for this
reason, the Tuareg welcome is legendary. They never forget to offer water, and
travelers who appear on the horizon will always be ‘treated like a king’.
Every
night, the families come together at the tents. The men are traditionally part
of the women’s group – not the other way round.
It
means the mother’s tent is the heart of the community – although they do not
eat together, and do much separately.
It
is the men who cover up their faces, while the women are happy to show off
their faces – although they often cover their hair
The
camels are of vital importance in the Sahara, and are often the only thing a
man is left with when he gets divorced
A
Tuareg man in a traditional indigo veil, which is likely to leave his face with
a blue mark across his skin
THE LEGENDARY QUEEN AT THE TOP OF THE TUAREG FAMILY TREE
The Tuareg’s many
small groups are joined together by the same family tree – and at the top of
that tree is the person who bought them all together.
And it should
probably come as no surprise for a tribe which views women in such regard, that
person was a queen.
Tin Hinan is said to
have traveled south from modern day Morocco to what would one day become
Algeria in the fourth century, where she became the first queen of the Tuaregs.It is from Tin Hinan
– whose name translates as ‘she of the tents’ – that every noble family is said
to descend.
Takamet, her
handmaiden who traveled by her side, is believed to be the ancestor of the
peasant caste. It is unlikely there
will be any quibbling over who gets what. Pre-nuptial agreements are the norm. In practice, this
often means a man is forced to return home to his mother, possibly with just
his camel and nothing else.
Now the Tuareg
living in south-western Libya face a new threat – that of ISIS – while those
living in Mali, Niger and northern Nigeria now have to contend with the rise of
Boko Haram.
The
Tuareg women, seen here arriving at the Tuareg Political Party speech in 2006,
may not obviously be part of political life, but their opinion is highly valued
by the men, who will likely discuss issues with their mother or wife.
